Lover's Leap

I heart Hope & Tim!!!

Winding Down?

It occurred to me this past weekend, when I woke up at 3am in a panic with the feeling that I miscalculated or somehow lost a work week to get ready for my upcoming BUSY season...that as people are winding down for the Holidays, I am getting B-U-S-Y!! (Wow, that was a long run on sentence!) Yes, my busy season is upon me. As the event coordinator, super dynamo, extraordinaire person, I have my work cut out for me. I'm about to see what i'm made of the next 2 months. But you know...

Oohhh, sometimes, I get a good feeling, yeah

I get a feeling that I've never never never never had before, no no

I get a good feeling!!

I got this. I. GOT. THIS.

Another late night!!!
When Christmas gets here I'm going to crash and be a lump on a log!!!

it's been...

a full day of hard work, fun, yummy desserts, stress, laughter, frustration, youth kiddos, zoo lights, coldness, lots more laughter, more my fingers are getting numb coldness, funny van rides, youth laughter, knitting, relaxing, more laughter, exhaustion.

it's late and i'm spent.

off to bed i go.

today...

• my face decided to break out like it was a middle school-er.
• i received my Christmas presents from the Stum-y-Garcia household, so now i have to sit and stare at them. Will i open early? probably not. i was 100% forbidden. Wow!!
• i spoke all evening in a variety of accents. often times, meshed together. and when that occurred...let's just say it more or less sounded like a pirate. Arr, matey!
• i laughed a lot today. then cried some too. it's been a mixture of emotions.
• i just noticed this has been my 2nd worst year--since i've begun--in the bloggy blog world. i over think it. all the time.
• i sing because i'm happy, i sing because i'm free
• i think it's time to start dreaming again
• i just like to smile. smiling's my favorite!

oh happy day

Happy Monday, Y'all!!!

michael & josh

i heart Michael Bublé! I don't care what any of you think....




i like Josh too....


 



 Deal with it, folks! Deal with it!!

the arts and kids

My friend Sarah shared this link with me today. I absolutely LOVE it. I have been praying about how to incorporate my love & experience of the arts and love for the kids in my community together for this upcoming year. This inspired me. Go watch!!

http://www.youtube.com/user/stpaulsartsandmedia

BELIEVING for a MIRACLE today!!

Believe with me. :)

sometimes, i crack myself up. seriously!!

Amen's and Aloha's

Hello, Howdy, Aloha all,

Hope everyone has had a great week. I have had a good one, even though its had some bumps, dents and scratches along the way. Literally. On Tuesday night I was t-boned by a 16 year old kid in a very large, old steel truck. Not fun. But, God is good. And I only have a few tiny marks. God definitely had His angels of protection surrounding me. It could have been worse. It should have been worse. But, let me say it again: GOD IS GOOD!!! He's a lover, a protector, a strong shield, and a refuge in times of trouble. Can I get an Amen!!!

I feel abundantly blessed. Oh, How He Loves us!!! But most importantly, there has been MUCH healing being brought to my life through this situation. I'm healing, I'm growing, I'm learning truly about how situations/accidents should be handled. Without fear and shame. I'm understanding what a healthy "sadness" about a situation is; and what is unhealthy and should not be embraced. Accidents happen. It's why they are called accidents. I am choosing to not take on shame when I shouldn't. I'm embracing the awkward and learning to be vulnerable. Thank God for Corky and Sharon. They have been AMAZING!! I mean, A-freakin'-MAZING. Especially since it was there car that was rammed and broken. They've been nothing but helpful, loving and supportive. I'm believing for the best outcome for the entire situation. I believe.
Amen, Amen, Amen!!!

On another joyous note, I just got a link to the house in Kauai. I'm so excited!!!! :) Click HERE to see for yourself!! Come on September 2012.

That's it for now!! Love and hugs to all you lovely readers of mine.

Aloha!!!

Kauai 2012 or Bust

I have a bit--er, I mean a lot--of Hawaii fever on this dreary Monday morning. Is this fever, random? Just out of nowhere?  Absolutely not. I was making my September 2012 plans to visit the 4th largest island in Hawaii just yesterday. That's right folks, don't be jealous. I will be vacationing with my CO family, whom I absolutely adore, to celebrate love, marriage and all things foreverness. Can't wait. Can't wait.

Hugs to you.

It's been a relaxing few days off of work. I have been full of thankfulness, love, joy, and excitement. And, maybe, just maybe...even some orneriness. Hey I'm not perfect. Overall, It's been fab. I can't believe we are so close to Christmas. How did it get here so fast?

Lots of love to you all!!
Hugs.

Ain't no party...

like a penguin and camel tea party!!

1, 2, 3, 4

tell me that you love me more
Sleepless, long nights, that's what my youth was for
ohh, oh oh

You know how people have those numbers around them all the time? Yes? No? Whatever.
Well, I always look at the clock at 12:34. All the time. ALL. THE. TIME!!! It's kinda comforting. It's kinda creepy. What does it mean?

Off the top of my head...

•  My head is pounding this morning. Must be the change in weather that is looming*. Or maybe even the champagne before bed last night to celebrate a friend.
• I feel the need to bake something this weekend. But what?
• So far, Siri, hasn't been all that helpful to me? Disappointed. 
• I need to start running**. Running is stupid. But, yet, running is good for you. Plus I somehow committed myself to a half marathon in April. I'm screwed.
• Speaking of April, I can't wait for my photo shoot, styled by the amazing Jill Carter of Common Couture to commemorate my birthday. Check her out y'all!!
• I need the warmth of a beach next to an ocean.
• Would really like to take a nap right now. 

*Not feeling any type of excitement for snow quite yet!! 
**Okay, I have been running, but not with joy in my heart. So maybe I need to change my attitude.

still here...

Dear Blog World,


I'm sorry I have neglected you. I have been busy. VERY busy. I'm still here though. Life has been wonderful. I'm growing. I'm learning. I'm loving. I'm happy. So, though, I have not wowed you with my wit and wisdom, I am still alive and well. Actually, better than well. I'm fantastic. Don't you fret though. I will get back in the habit of writing, musing, being downright silly and all that goodness. I will write on here again. I will carry on with nonsensical randomness. I just need to catch my breath in my busyness. 


How have you been blog world?
What do you want to know from me? 


That's all!!


For now, I bid you adieu. 

GO POKES!!!

Have you checked out my boys lately?! They're killing it. Love them, LOVE them.

Fall & Winter Mix

Fall

Oh Fall, how I love you!!
Please tarry awhile.
No need to rush away.


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For you, Rebecca..

I can't really think of anything to blog yet. But you asked me to. Because you are in the faraway beautiful land of Norway. But, here's the deal, I returned from Boulder in the very late hours of the evening. Actually when I got home it was the very EARLY wee hours of the morning. Now i'm here, blogging about nothingness--simply 'cause I love you. And if I don't do it right at this second, i'll forget. I'm at work now. Not really 'back in the game' quite yet as I fear my heart was broken all over again yesterday. It's hard to say good bye to those who know you so well. Even harder when you love them so completely & whole-heartedly. But alas, I move forward. Forward to go get more coffee. I bid you adieu now. Give your Vikings my love.

Good!

Morning Surprise!!

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Surprise of surprises. Today...I just may have blogged over HERE!!!

Okie Proud

You can take the girl out of Oklahoma,

but you can't take Oklahoma out of the girl.

Just purchased this from Tree and Leaf. Much thanks to the lovely Misty Bradley who led me to their site via her crazy pinning on pinterest. She's a gangsta pinna'. Queen of the pins. A pinning machine. Shall I go on? A pintacular pinner gal that's a pinnin' pins on the pinnin' page. Okay, I'll stop now. And onto the shirt I purchased....

And this (below) arrived in the mail on Tuesday! Word. I'll be sporting this on Fridays. I love wearing my Orange Pride on Friday's. (Don't worry Utah, I'll wear a Red Utes tee, too! Not at the same time, mind you, but at some point. You get the picture!)

"Go Pokes!"

I LOVE my State. I do, I really do.
I'm an Okie at heart.

September. What?!

Dear 2011,

September here already!? What? How did that happen so fast? I feel like you are flying by and there's still so much I want to do, experience, enjoy, and even, revel in. It hasn't been a horrible time or even dreaded, you're just flying by too fast. There are things I want to get done before you are over and done with. It seems your buddy 2012 will be here in a flash. I need to get in gear and live the last 4 months of you to my absolute fullest. Yes, oh yes!!!

That's all.

Raelynn

ps...feel free to throw some extra fun, unashamedly divine surprises my way. i won't turn them down.

Summer is on its last leg and Fall is fast approaching. I can't believe I've lived in Utah for 4 months already. It still seems just like yesterday that I pulled up to the Jordan household scared, excited, and ready for my new adventure. I'm still loving every minute of it and am looking forward to a fun Fall. I'm going to be very busy. But that really excites me as well. I like the hustle and bustle of a busy schedule. I'm sure i'll have a few days where I crash because I've pushed myself to the limits. Until then, I'm going for it. Like a spider monkey that sees something shiny. My future is bright. I know it is. Still excited about all that's in store.

Love to you all, my faithful readers!!

i miss Sarah! it was a fun 3 weeks with her here in Utah. as always, she made me laugh so hard. good times. next up: rachel!!!! what an exciting month for me in regards to visitors.

Wow, it's been a while!!

I've been busy with work, busy entertaining a house guest, busy enjoying the fun in the sun. Saying fun in the sun, totally reminded me of the YMCA summer camp. I can confidently say, I did not miss that mess this summer. Love the kids. Love the Y workers. Don't love the chaos.

I have Sarah visiting me now. She'll leave on Monday and then by the following Saturday Rachel will be here. My cup overflows!!

That's all.

crazy, crazy, crazy week ahead.

remember me in your prayers and send happy thoughts my way.

why i shouldn't be sick for an extended period of time

Oh the perils of sickness. Why do you hover around me? Is it that you feel I should be irritable, unsociable, achy, groggy and drained for over a week and half now? I fought against you while in Colorado. I wouldn't let you keep me down while I was with those lovlies. But here you are in full force. Pushing back. Pushing stronger. And here I am being a pushover. Yet, I still have some fight in me. Even if you don't care that the next week and half is overwhelmingly busy. You pretend to be blind to the fact that I have much to do and no time to do it in. You have no concern for my feelings of health and vibrancy. Bastard, how very dare you!! You keep me up at night tossing and turning. You keep me drugged where my roommates think i'm hallucinating. You have been a pain in my arse for 12 days and nights now. You have me talking to you as if you are a person. And if you respond, I won't worry or become concerned that I'm hearing voices. I'll know its the cold and cough meds kicking in and working their healing wonders and I'll soon be drifting off into sleepy time land. In spite of your non-concern for me, I tell you this...I will prevail. I may sound like Liza Minelli or Kathleen Turner or like I've been smoking for a hundred years. My throat may burn and my ears may ache. BUT, the show must go on regardless of your callousness. I will prevail, damn it! I will prevail.

live the life you imagine

My friend sweet Jenn thought of me when she saw this. Love it.

off the top of my head...

Colorado, you were AMAZING!!!

Carter & Kofahl Fams, I MISS you so much.

Sarah & Jenn, thanks for the uncontrollable LAUGHS this past Friday.

Blonde Girl, step OFF my unicorn be-@tc#!!

Unicorn, get in gear and become a stallion ALREADY.

Those who aren't in the unicorn know, so SORRY!!

YMCA of BV, oh shucks...I HEART you. So happy to see as many of you as I did.

Lady on the plane, you really need to learn rules of PERSONAL space.

Sickness, here's a flash: I'm SICK of you. Go away.

Shannon, I love YOUR love of the Bachelorette and Adam Levine.

Utah, I missed you. I feel I'm getting into the swing of things here. You make me HAPPY.

Alka Seltzer, WORK your healing wonders.

Bed, I'll be seeing you SOON!!!!!!!!

we do what we do

i've been working long days.

but it's all for the greater pay off.

yet, the long days combined with sickness...

equals a very tired raelynn.

very tired!!!

getting up early.

staying up late.

sheesh!!

ps... i have found that dayquil makes me a space case while attempting to work and do my job.

yep.

pss... speaking of being a space case, i need to tell a funny story of when i was at the beginning stages of sickness and was doped on drugs and slept an entire day away. basically, shannon and chris thought i had lost my mind and was hallucinating. but again, i'm tired, so, basically that means, to be continued, friends....

i hate summer colds!! boo.

Dear Blog Readers,

I totally intended to write you something lovely, fun and full of my witty witty ways. But as you know I was up late, hence the midnight posting. So instead, I am snuggling into my bed right now. I've taken the advilPM and am going to drift off, hopefully, into deep dream land.

Love, hugs and happiness to you all!!

Night.

Off the top of my head...

I'm really excited I was able to see Amber Sweeney this evening--even if it was just for dinner. Sometimes, layovers, area good thing.

I'm irritated that I'm not sleeping right at this moment.

Friends are amazing gifts that should be treasured and celebrated. Even the fake ones. You know who you are (wink, wink!!)...I adore you!!

I miss the Stum-y-Garcia's. SO MUCH!!

Reunions in airports always make me weepy. My heart is still smiling from the ones I saw today.

I love people watching. You learn so much, merely by observing.

Apparently, God hears me LOUD and CLEAR! Hmpphhh!! Well, then why does He not give me what I want, or work in my time frame, or do things the way I see it, or...? Seriously, Isn't it all about me? Wait, what? It's not. Tragic.

I didn't run or walk today. I almost feel guilty. Almost.

All we need is love. Love is all we need.

S.A.T.U.R.D.A.Y. NIGHT!!

I went to the SLC Jazz Festival with Corky and Sharon tonight. It was relaxing and fun. Even when the crazy wind gusts came in and I was attacked by twigs from the tree above my head. Seriously. When I got home I was still pulling them out of my shirt. There were quite a few interesting characters there, which was awesome for my need to people watch. I also learned that some SLC folks, nobody how hard they try, do not have rhythm.



Also, at one point this lady came and sat in front of me and I was so distracted wondering, "What would Stacy and Clinton think?"



That's all.

I heart mojitos

These are fabulous!!! I am getting better with each batch.

Anyone want to come over and partake?


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Strengths Test

Everyone here in Utah, literally almost everyone--just kidding..but not really--has taken the Strengths test. It's from the book called, "Now Discover Your Strengths". Not wanting to be left out, I rushed down to nearest B&N to get the book.

'Cause I'm in the know. I'm hip. I'm happenin'!

Okay, actually...

I feel like everyone has at some point in conversation since I've moved here has said, "Have you taken the strengths test? What are yours?" In reality I tried and tried not to take it, 'cause damn it I don't conform anymore just because everyone else is doing it. But after chattering Sharon's ears off for hours about life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, she suggested I take the test. At first, the rebellious monster inside of me was like, Hell to the nah! But after a little thought and consideration I figured it wouldn't hurt. After all I am working on an upgrade in my life. And upgrades take work, take initiative, take tests to get better acquainted with oneself.

So as you may have guessed I took myself to Barnes and Nobles and got the "Strengths Finder 2.0" -the improved version, which was on sale, WORD! On Tuesday evening I took the Strengths test to see exactly how I roll--if your picking up what I'm laying down. There are 34 different themes, or strengths. Once you finish the test, they give you the top 5 themes from strongest down.

Here's my results...

Positivity
People who are especially talented in the Positivity theme have an enthusiasm that is contagious. They are upbeat and can get others excited about what they are going to do.

Includer
People who are especially talented in the Includer theme are accepting of others. They show awareness of those who feel left out, and make an effort to include them.

Restorative
People who are especially talented in the Restorative's theme are adept at dealing with problems. They are good at figuring out what is wrong and resolving it.

Empathy

People who are especially talented in the Empathy theme can sense the feeling of other people by imagining themselves in others' lives or others' situations.

Woo
People who are especially talented in the Woo theme love the challenge of meeting new people and winning them over. They derive satisfaction from breaking the ice and making a connection with another person.

******************************

Are you surprised? I'm not.

After you are given the results, they also include a broader synopsis of the theme with some ideas for action and application. The goal is to teach you how to best work within your strengths in order to succeed. As you learn about the other themes, you also learn how to work with others who's themes are opposite of yours.

Though I was rebellious, I have learned a lot. And they aren't wrong at all because as I read the broader definition and the applications, I was constantly laughing and saying, "that's definitely me!" I love it when that happens. The test is really great because it doesn't allow for you to edit yourself in a way so you will score high on something. You know everyone does that on tests, so they feel better about themselves and can be like, "see I'm so humble and good!!" This comes at you practically and asks in a way that you can't help but answer honestly.

I say, if you haven't done it...give it a go!! Just do it. You know you want to. Okay, be rebellious for a wee moment and then do it. Honestly, it has helped me shed light on why I do what I do. And the bonus is reading about other themes/strengths. Now I'm also learning about what makes those who are not like me tick. You know, what floats their boat. Revs their engine. Yadda, yadda, yadda. Do it, do it, do it. Then let me know your results.

Cheerios!

some favorites

i know i haven't blogged in a bit. Jon Acuff told me that if i wanted to keep my readers i needed to give you something every day. i'm learning folks, i'm learning. it's a process. still learning balance of my blog. 'Cause trust me, i got lots to say. blah, blah, blah. i do have some thoughts for you, but until i can put them down here for your eyes to feast upon, here are some of my favorites lately for you to enjoy as much as I have...

1. The body image of a Coke Bottle blog post by the amazingly talented Jill Carter of Common Couture.
2. Anything by Jon Acuff.
3. My girl crush, Zooey Deschanel. Oh, Zooey, I covet thy oxen. (i.e. all of her talent and utter coolness)
4. I've been enjoying Pinterest lately. It's a great place to organize and keep all things Y-O-U! My friend Misty is a Pinterest maniac. She has like 3o something boards and over 1600 pins. That's what I love about her. :)
5. Close your eyes and enjoy, Hope Glenn...

Chris J

Shannon bought some glow in the dark bracelets last week for her Ragnar Relay teammates. She had some extra and brought them home for the boys. Well, on Monday night one was left on the ground and Chris walked in the living room, picked it up and said, "What's this, for a rave?" And then proceeded to do the funniest rave dance imitation. Shannon and I laughed so hard we couldn't breathe. Soon after our favorite AT&T commercial came on and we both agreed....it was Chris.

Good times, good times!!!

what do you want from me?

Lil' Reminder

Loved this little reminder by Jon Acuff on Dreams and chasing after them.

Read it by clicking HERE!

Ellie & Rosco

While the roommates have been in Colorado visiting family, I have been on dog patrol. I can confidently say, I do not, I repeat, I DO NOT like them at all. Sorry Shannon if you are reading this. It's not you. It's your dogs!

Ellie has broken out every day since they've been gone and when I return from work the neighbors are walking her over because they caught her roaming the street. They've even tried to keep her in their yard, but she jumps their fence too. Sheesh!! And Rosco isn't so bad, he just stinks. Blech!! These dogs have been the thorn in my flesh this past week. Im ready for Shannon to return tomorrow so she can be on dog patrol.

Lord, give me some grace and patience!!

Rx for Homesickness

What up bloggy blogerson folks? To my faithful few readers, sorry i've been MIA. Its been a bit since my last post. I have been busy with my new job. It's an amazing job too. Be jealous, very jealous. I'm so thankful and blessed that God loves me so much that He would have a job for me within 2 weeks of arriving here. I've also been busy exploring life here in the beautiful and quirky state of Utah! I'm looking forward to seeing everything that unfolds. I'm so excited I can hardly stand it. If you were here with me right now as I'm typing this you would see the big smile of wonder and expectation upon my face. That's right!!

I won't lie though, I'm still homesick, but I've come to understand, in a way, I always will. My friends, who became my family, in Colorado will always be utterly important. After all, they are some of the most dear and special people I know who have walked with me through the trenches, laughed with me in good times and are always there for me, even if I am 500 miles away. And when you can't be with them as before, your heart can't help but long for them. That's right Colorado folk, my heart longs for and misses you.

Below is a personal list of Rx for my homesickness...

1. Ikea.
You all know about my love for Ikea. I wandered around that store the first 2 weeks I landed in this state. It has a way of making me feel better as you walk around and peruse all the fun things they have.

2. Walks
You know, get those endorphins pumping. Once the endorphins pump, you can't be sad. Know what I mean, butter bean?

3. Sunday hikes with amazing Friends
Exploring the Utah mountains. Where there may be rattlesnakes that are ready to pounce if you're not careful. Seriously. Cody almost got it.





4. Singing
Lots of singing with my invisible air microphone. Yeah, I said it.

5. "Double L" with Sharon & Corky
L + L = Lattes and Love. I haven't been afraid to ask for some L&L from those wonderful Seevinck folk.

6. Wednesday Night Pizza and Ice Cream dessert
I have an amazing new roommate who wanted to carry on my Wednesday night pizza & ice cream dessert tradition that I had with Ellyn & Rhonda, so I have something comfortable and familiar that feels like home. Though she puts her own twist on it and we make pizza from scratch. That's right foks...from SCRATCH!! But, I do miss that Digiorno.

7. Exploring, living and being happy
Just out and about and exploring!! Seeing what life has to offer and learning to not be so afraid of everything.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Oh, and it always helps the homesickness when you get an email, text or phone call. And I do a happy dance when I get cards in the mail. Today I about broke something when I did spontaneous cartwheels* because when I got home from work I found a package waiting for me from the Stum-y-Garcia's full of goodies and comfort from home. I loved all the little sticky notes on each present. I had stuff for pedi's. Some yummy snacks. (I was told it was okay to NOT share sometimes, ha!). I think the one that really made me laugh was the AdvilPM with a note that said, "Get some freakin' sleep already".

They really know me well!!




*You can decide for yourself if I really did spontaneous cartwheels! ;)

Love This...

and...GO...

• The gloominess of the weather needs to change soon. I need me some sun!!
• I'm enjoying my job. I can tell that I'm really going to like it there.
• Having bunny ears antennae, rather than cable can be disappointing at times. No Idol for me tonight. It's the home town visits. Those are the best.
• I miss my CO family. I need me some Libby Lou. She is the best snuggler.
• Haven't been sleeping at night. Boo!! Just took 2 Advil PM.
• A Fancy Feast commercial came on that just made me get all teary eyed. And, I hate cats.
• I have a headache because I haven't slept much the last couple of weeks. Hence the Advil PM. I NEED to sleep.
• I'm getting sleepy. Seriously.
• Excited about girls night tomorrow with Halen. On a school night...even better.
• Still excited about my new adventure here in Utah!!

The Big O

On my 16th day in my new State of Utah I got a job. Whoop, Praise Him!! I am super excited and encouraged with the opportunity and potential this job holds. After I got the call, accepted, called everyone I love to tell them how extremely excited and blessed I was that God has a perfect plan laid out for me, I knew exactly how I would celebrate. How you ask? It's simple...

With Orgasm!

However, I found my only dilemma was which one I wanted. Did I want the Regular, Super or The Multiple? After much deliberation I went with just the regular ole Orgasm. And let me tell you, friends, I am not disappointed!! Fan-freakin'-tastic!!! I feel so giddy and peachy and beautiful. The glow is fabulous. I've decided to save Super and The Multiple for my next celebrations in which I need to live it up. You know, start at the beginning and then continue to grow the Orgasm collection.

If you don't have Orgasm, Get it!!! You won't be disappointed. Just click HERE and all your Orgasm dreams can come true.

Ooh, la la...this was so risque of me. Just a fun little play on words folks.

You gotta lighten up. Deal with it.

Meet Ezra

He's a blast!!!!


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Ready? Go....

• job hunting can be damaging to the ego. 35+ jobs and counting that i have applied to so far.
• homesickness is not fun. but I also know it doesn't mean the decision was wrong. Time will tell.
• learning a new rhythm of life is scary and exciting all at the same time. basically, i can create anything i want and be who I know i am....if i just believe in myself.
• Ikea is the wonder place to roam when you are sad. seriously, grab a twist cone and just roam. it does wonders.
• emails, calls, texts and letters from home do wonders for the soul!!
• thinking about volunteering at Make-a-Wish Foundation.
• Thinking I need to go explore the city some more to see where else i can apply. Might end up at Ikea before days end.

that's all!!

Please, Jesus, find me a job SOON!!

Job hunting is not fun. But, I know, God has something for me that is GREAT!!! I just need to learn the patience. I hope it comes quickly. The job and patience!!

Random Finds

I've made it. Utah is my new home. It took a very boring, not because of the company but because of 1-80 the end of the world, drive. The point is I arrived. Safe, happy, anxious, excited, scared to pieces. Yet ready to face the new adventure.

I'm trying to get everything organized so I can feel more at home. The organization helps distract the homesickness I have been feeling since E & R drove away. Tonight while cleaning/purging/organizing my stash of odds and ends, I stumbled upon these fun little finds tucked away in the back of my jewelry thingamabob...

1. Photo of a very young Papa Rod. I miss him so much. And it only fuels the homesickness I'm feeling right at this moment.
2. An old Oklahoma drivers license. I look so young. Oh those were the days of no wrinkles and no gray hair.
3. Keys: 1 to a house in Stillwater, 1 to a post office box somewhere, 1 to I have no freakin' clue.
4. 6.39 in Euros
5. 10 pesos

It's funny how you stash things away and then forget them. Or maybe it's that you are not sure what to do with the stuff so you just put it somewhere only to forget about it and then years later decide to organize because its what helps you cope with the overwhelming homesickness you're feeling that honestly you've never experienced before and that homesickness makes you want to curl up in a corner and cry like a baby until you can't cry anymore. Yes, a very bad run on sentence. But that's what the homesickness has done to me.

Hmmm. It's really late. I never stay up this late.

I must continue organizing.

oh my freakin' gosh it's SOOOO CLOSE to moving time.

Craziness!!!


Utah or Bust.

"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do."

~Eleanor Roosevelt


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these make me smile...

In case you haven't figured it out

I'm moving.
To Utah.

No words. I'm at a loss. I'm excited, I'm sad. I'm hoping for the best. I'm already missing my lovelies here.



- Posted using BlogPress from my funtacular iPhone

birthday's are fun

today...was a great day!!

that's all.

nothing

Mmm bop,

Ba duba dop, ba du bop

Ba duba dop, ba du bop

Ba duba dop

Ba du

See what I did there Jana?! A whole lot of nothingness. :)

So glad the week is over.

Seriously.

GLAD!!

Happy.

Ecstatic.

It's done.

Thank the Good Lord above.

It was a rough, rough week.

One crazy roller coaster ride.

Fo sheezy, weezie!!!!

finally.....

the first cover letter and resume was sent to the Girl Scouts of Utah. Heck Yeah!!!!

It looks awesome if I do say so myself.

Utah peeps...any suggestions on where to apply?

haiku

for Jana:

you know sometimes it's okay

to just simply write

about nothingness all day

have i ever mentioned how much i hate writing cover letters? well, i do. i hate them. i hate them with a passion. a passion of epic proportions. i loathe them. i detest them entirely.

yes, i may or may not, be having a bit of a hang up writing the dreaded cover letter. believe it or not, i don't do well talking wonderfully about myself. pblhh!! plus, how do you say in a wee paragraph, 'hey, i'm fan-flippin'-tastic, hire me!"?

o.v.e.r.w.h.e.l.m.e.d.

my pep talk to myself: "buck up Longhat. you got this!!"

40

including today, there's 40 left.

holy freakin' moley!!

thinking about oh so much these days. my mind is spinning out of control. literally. i wish i could temper the thoughts. but, change is coming. it makes me crazy. even good change. it just makes me CRAZY!! i get nervous in the unknown. but i'm learning to take steps of BIG fat faith.

Grrr!!

I've been trying to blog about what's going on in my head. As I've sat down the last week to tell the blogosphere what I'm feeling, all that I seemed to type was....

Grrr!!!

That's how I've been feeling the last couple of days. As I was talking to Jana today at lunch, we decided I need a "grrr" interpreter because I can't really place exactly what i'm feeling. It's not a

Grr!!

or a

grrr.

or even a

GRRR......

but rather just a,

Grrr!!!

So any 'grr' interpreters out there, feel free to let me know what's going on inside of my head these days.

In true Raelynn brilliance I burnt my neck while curling my hair this morning. This wee burn feels like my flesh is peeling off at a painstakingly slow speed. The things we women endure to feel pretty.





Yes I know this photo looks suspect. But I promise it's a burn and not a hickey. Actually when asked today if I was telling fibs about "the burn" and was it a hot date last night...my response was, "I wish!!"

Oh how I wish!!!


- Posted using BlogPress from my handy dandy super fun iPhone

Adventures with Eye Dilation

So, picture it: Kaiser Permanente Opthamalogy, 2011

Here I am, being a busy bee, getting all of my appointments done in the next 2 months. I decided to go to Kaiser for my eye appointment because its cheap. Just my regular ole $15 copay. I meet the lovely eye optician assistant--(please excuse my lack of knowing their official name). She takes me in, starts me on reading out the letters and then on to looking for the hot air balloon and then on to the oh so fun, eye puff while your head is in the eye doctor head gear thingamabob. After the eye puff we head to the room where the optician will do her thing. You know, the continued follow the hot air balloon, what's the clearest row you can read, etc. etc. When I was waiting for the optician, the eye assistant lady, (still don't know official name, but really wish I did at this point), decided to give me some wet drops because my eyes were so dry they were bothering me. I came in with them already dry because of the ever changing Colorado weather that makes my allergies run amok. She tells me to lean back and drops in the wet drops. I lean back and await the goodness of eye drops that will make my eyes not feel like I need to scratch them completely out. The she says, one more. I open my eyes again. As the drops fall into my eyes, within 1 second I scream: "sweet Baby Jesus". Yes, I did. Really. And then the burn intensifies. The eye assistant lady then says, "oh sorry, the eye dilation drops do burn." I'm pretty sure my response was, "Wait, what? I have to go back to work". Her response, "Oh, oops!"

She seriously said, "oops!"

I can tell you now, "oops" is never good. I know, I use it often. My eyes feel like they are burning out of their sockets because she put in a butt load of the dilation drops. She tells me that more than likely it will be a few hours for the dilation to go away. Okay, not bad. Not fun, but not too terribly bad. So, the Doctor comes in does the eye exam in which I basically repeat everything the eye assistant did. Except since my eyes were dilated we went ahead and did the super bright light into the core of my eyes to see if there's anything wrong. All is good, which I knew, no need for the dilation drops. With the exception of needing glasses to magnify my two focus points so I don't get headaches, I've got awesome eyes. And they are beautifully, exotically, natively brown. But I digress...the Doctor gives me a new prescription for my glasses and walks out of the room. I look down at the sheet and could not see a thing other than weird little scribbles. Literally I could not read thing. The Doctor walked back in and our conversation went a little like this...

me: "um, I can't read this at all. How long will this last? I do have to go back to work."

Dr.: "oh it can take 4 to 6 hours!"

me: "hmmm, okay. Should I be driving? I can't read this at all"

Dr.: "Do you have to go far? You should be fine."

me: "uh, okay!"

Then I said to myself, "self, this is going to be interesting!" So I head on out of Kaiser with the fun little shades--very sexy, not--they give you to protect your eyes because I left my sunglasses in the car. And as I'm driving back to work I start to become uncomfortable. I can see to drive just fine, but as I'm driving I notice I can't read the road and store signs along the way. It was a weird feeling to not see clearly. I made it back to the Y and proceeded to have to wear my sunglasses for the next 3.5 hours...indoors. I felt ridiculous. Of course, I had the Raelynn dramatics when I walked in to Cassie and Jana's office and shouted, "I'm blind!" They laughed, hard. So supportive those 2!! I managed to go about the rest of my day by not doing any work that I needed to get done and stuffed envelopes for Ellyn. I had to do something to earn my paycheck for that afternoon.

For some reason, as I was not able to read a thing, I felt the need to shout when speaking. I don't know. I felt like my other senses were in overdrive since I couldn't see as clearly as I normally do. Random I know. But, random I am. I'm a feeler. An expresser of emotions. This is just me. So when my eyes finally did come back in full force, you shouldn't be shocked that I screamed, "It's a miracle!" I'm not going to lie, I was a bit worried that nothing would be clear again. I did not enjoy it at all. Dilation of the eyes is a big fat negative for me. In a moment of non existent theatrics, I did realize how blessed I was to have good vision. And took a moment to thank God for the blessings in my life that I overlook on a daily basis.

After my little adventure of the eye dilation, Ellyn and I were talking about it and how I got upset that I did not have control over the situation and that's what freaked me out most of all. Then she posed the question...

"If you had to choose between your vision and hearing, what would you want to lose of the two?"

Obviously I had reasons why I would want/need both. I can't imagine not hearing music or seeing a sunset. I came to the conclusion that I would not want to choose because...for obvious reasons...I want to keep everything.

All of this randomness is to say...because of my moment of not having clear vision, it was a little reminder that I am truly blessed and I need to not be blind to the fact that there is so much...so much...to be thankful for in my life. Even when I don't see it clearly, it's there and slowly, in time, with patience and less theatrics, everything becomes visible and clear.

Like how I threw a little Jesucristo in there on you out of nowhere in this nonsensical post??!!! In a way...I just Jesus Juked you. Booya!!!

that's the 2nd time I've said Booya in a post. Who am I?!

jump in

"The character* has to jump into the story,

into the discomfort and the fear,

otherwise the story will never happen."

From Donald Miller's A Million Miles in a Thousand Years




* the character = Raelynn

bedtime ADD

really tired. but can not sleep...AT ALL!!!

the most random thoughts are floating around my head and, unfortunately, keeping me wide awake. i wish there was some sort of order to them, but my mind is in ADD mode right now. It looks a little like this:

....i don't want to go to work tomorrow...

...how many more days until i have a new niece?...

...sheesh, you need to go to sleep...

{insert quiet mind for maybe 3.2 seconds here, then the beat begins in my head}

...the scars of your love remind me of us, they keep me thinking that we almost had it all, the scars of your love, they leave me breathless, i can't help feeling we could have had it all...

...stop, go to sleep...

...i think i really want to write a book...

{insert rhythmic drum beat sounds floating around my head right about now}

...i wonder if there are any powwows coming up soon?...

...don't forget to write the pro's and con's for your future plans...

...Really, really?! Go to sleep...

...how do I become the main character in my story, rather than the quirky sidekick? more importantly, how do i make my story more meaningful?...

{insert frustrated sigh here}

...latte in the morning? yes, please! ooo, i'll get one for Janet too...

...okay, this is ridiculous, you need to sleep...

{silence for about 10 seconds}

...maybe i'll blog....

and so on, and so on!!!!!

funnily enough those really are only some of the thoughts, lyrics and sounds floating around in my head.

frustrating.

so here i am. awake. blogging. not sleeping. thinking. of complete utter ridiculousness. mixed in with a song that i can't seem to escape. add a dash of overwhelming thoughts--good, bad, happy, sad--about the joy ride i like to refer to as an emotional rollercoaster regarding the next season of my life. if i were to be completely honest, i would say that its more the "dash" that's keeping me awake, and avoiding, and in overdrive with bedtime ADD as i'm still not 100% how to process the next season yet.

???

can't get enough of...

1. Adele

Love her, love her, love her!! I'm loving her new album 21. I listen to it on repeat 24/7. The first track on the album called "Rolling in the Deep," moves me in ways I can't explain. It's her voice, the musicality, the drums, the feeling of the song...it all beckons something deep within me. I can't even explain it. But I know that every time I listen to it, it evokes crazy emotions out of me. From crying to happiness to overall courage. And the drums just call me. I'm positive thats the natural tribalness in me. I must see her when she tours the grand ole U.S. of A. (Hope, don't buy tickets without me!!) Seriously. I absolutley love her.




2. A Million Miles in a Thousand Years by Donald Miller

This book has totally been changing the way I see my life. It makes me look closer at what I want my story to be. And there's really nothing fancy schmancy about it other than its simplicity of making you look at your life differently. It's really helping me face the giants and not feel like such a grasshopper. I'm halfway through it, but can already tell that I will re-read this book.

"fear is a manipulative emotion that can trick us into living a boring life."

Boring no more, my friends. And, giants, I'm gonna come at you like a spider monkey!

3. Dessert

Yep. Utter yummyness. Living with Ellyn and Rhonda has changed me in so many ways for the better. And that statement alone deserves a whole other post. However, at this time, one thing I will always include in my life because of them from now on is simply this...dessert. For so many years I would feel guilty about dessert. There's so much more to this on an emotional level and how I can equate dessert to letting go and enjoying the sweetness of life, but we'll keep it light. Actually, I have had dessert almost every night that I have lived with them and have continued to drop the pounds--maybe not super fast but the point is I'm not adding them. And that's without working out. Booyah!! Yeah, I said that. I'm not sure I have ever said that before. Weird. Again, there's more to this on a differnet level. But like I said before, we're keeping it light for now.


4. Vino

"Red, red wine you make me feel so fine, you keep me rockin' all of the time."

Name that tune and you'll win a prize. Okay probably not, but it was fun to say.


5. Olive

Love this munchkin face. I keep trying to steal her from my friend Danielle but to no avail. Fortunately, she comes and hangs out with me at my house every now and then. Plus I get to see her at the Y every day.





and last, for now, but certainly not least....

6. Carlos

He works at Beauty Brands in Boulder and always makes my hair so damn sexy. He and I will be meeting again very soon. He always gets a good laugh at me when I'm in because when he is done wiht my hair I normally flip it around in the mirror and say the ever so famous pantene commercial line, "don't hate me because i'm beautiful!"

Home Sick: Day 2

I didn't go to work again today. Too bad it's not because I'm having a day-o-fun off of work. But, oh NO, I'm still feeling craptacular. So on Day 2 of being home this is what I'm up to while I'm going stir crazy in the negative degree weather.

1. Sleeping. Lots of sleeping.

2. Emergen C, Alka Seltzer and a few sinus rinse's here and there. I know. Yuck. But to know me, is to know all of me.

3. Reading, "A soft place to land". Almost done with that and will move on to "East of Eden" by Steinbeck.

4. Finally showered. That changes the attitude immensely.

5. Still celebrating in the fact that I finally beat jillbutterfly once in a game of words with friends. Word!



Who know's when or if I'll ever see that again.

6. Lots of ANTM and Grey's.

7. Thinking of my first trip to the Portland, Oregon/Battle Ground, WA area to visit some lovely ladies. Here I come Amber and Jessicca. Hope you're ready for me.

8. Lunch = popcorn and chocolate

9. Thinking and thinking.



10. Attempting to bloggy blog.

Wow. It's been awhile. I'm still here. Just haven't felt like blogging. Not that I haven't had much to say....just haven't felt like writing it all down in blogger world. I'm sure my random randomyness will pop up again soon.

Stay tuned!!